September 2, 2015 | Posted in:Social TV
It was vacation. It was supposed to be fun and relaxing, right? Well, not on this day. I was up early with kids. The sun was shining bright, and I couldn’t wait to hit the beach. Our beach house was filled with friends. What could be better? It was 9:30 a.m. and time to get the kids ready. I was the early bird; the rest of the house took their time, but I couldn’t wait. I love the quiet mornings on the beach: not too crowded yet, still a little chill in the air, waves crashing, and the smell of the ocean. So, let’s do this, kiddies!
I tell my sweet, precious 4-year-old it was time to get dressed, and all hell broke loose! “I am not going to the beach. I am not putting my bathing suit on! NO! NO! NO!” she screamed. I calmly told her to lose her attitude and get moving. Her response–she kicked me in the stomach! Yes, you heard me right. My sweet little girl kicked me so hard it nearly knocked the wind out of me. I was enraged. I have never hit my children. I don’t believe in spankings or that type of punishment. (I know everyone has their own way. This is mine.) BUT I wanted to smack the shit out of her, I was so angry! I walked out of the room and stood in the doorway and told her she could not come out until she calmed down.
I stood there in tears. She was screaming. A tantrum like nothing ever before had ensued. My H came to my rescue, but I asked him to wait so I could handle it. My H is the most patient and calm human being I know. Opposites clearly do attract. She started screaming for daddy. In my head, I was laughing to myself. “Daddy can’t help you now, girlfriend. You’re mine!” It continued for 30 minutes. My dear friends tried to help, but I was determined to stand my ground and teach her a lesson. She cannot behave this way, I thought. OMG! This is crazy! I just want to go to the beach! I’m missing valuable tanning time! Forty-five minutes later and several attempts to calm her down, I was having no luck. I was sweating, crying, angry, upset, and felt like the worst fucking mom ever!
H finally said, “Babe, let me take over.” So I thought I would take this opportunity to bond with my 8-year-old guy. I said okay to H and asked my little man if he wanted to join me at the beach. We packed up the beach buggy with half the house, and all of the supplies we’d need for the day and I attempted to be super-mom now. I dragged, pushed, and pulled this 90-pound buggy, what felt like a mile, to the water. We made it! Just the two of us. I thought, “Okay, this day is going to turn around.”
No more than five minutes later, after I unloaded the chairs, toys, snack bag, umbrella, blanket, towels, and tent, my son says, “I’m bored!” I said, “Okay, let’s build a sand castle.” His reply? “Nah.” I said, “Let’s collect shells.” “Nope.” “Let’s go boogie boarding!!!” I declare. (I hate swimming in the ocean by the way but would do anything at this point to make this child happy.) “No!” he says. “When are our friends coming? This is boring!” My vision of playing and bonding alone with my 8-year-old was being crushed right before my eyes. What was happening? Did both my kids hate and loathe their mom? OMG! I wanted to run in the ocean and drown myself at that very moment! (Don’t panic, I didn’t really want to drown myself, but it sounded like a good idea at the time.)
I was devastated. Some vacation. Did I mention it was only day two? Then my little guy asked if we could go back to the house. I wanted to cry! I said, “I just lugged our stuff up here and we are not leaving!” “Mom, this is so boring, can we please go?” And then I did what I had never done before and said, “Go ahead! But, I’m staying.” He looked at me in disbelief. Was I really allowing my little guy to venture home alone? But then he turned around and started walking back to the house. I didn’t really think he’d leave me! I frantically texted my H to meet him so he wasn’t “really” walking home alone, and then I cried.
H called and told me he had both kids, and my little princess was calm. He said he was going to stay at the house so I could have some much needed alone time. What? Alone time? I thought I was on a family vacation! It was sweet of him and he was so concerned about how sad I was, but now I felt worse. I tried to breathe and enjoy this “alone time,” but I kept looking back waiting and watching for my crew. I wanted to run away. Go home. Pretend this stupid fun family vacation idea never happened. I was an awful mom and my kids hate me. That was my thought for the next hour. I sat there alone on the beach with monster trucks, shovels, and 10 chairs for what felt like an eternity. I didn’t want to be alone. I work so much and never spend quality time with my kids and now this!
An hour-and-a-half later, I was awakened by a kiss on my cheek. I somehow managed to drift off to sleep (probably because I was totally hung over), but when I woke up, two little people were standing over me. “Sorry, mommy,” they said. My little guy kissed me again then ran to play with his friends, and my little girl (the little monster from earlier) hugged me tighter than ever before and then asked if I wanted to go collect shells with her. My girlfriends rallied around me, giving me looks of support and the I-so-know-how-you-feel-right-now look. It was going to be okay, I thought. A little hiccup in my plan for the perfect day at the beach, but I am happy to report the rest of the week went much smoother. Don’t get me wrong, there were tantrums and fights and whatnot, but we survived, and we enjoyed.
We are Blondie and Red, two moms who leave our children at home and come to the television set of a national talk show and transition to the role of producers. We have a lot of love, a lot of guilt, and a lot of great stories to share that we know every fierce and fabulous working mom can relate to. Some call it bitching. We call it bitchin’! Read more about us at 2tvchicks.com.
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Emmy-nominated network television producer Deborah Mitchell is a veteran of ABC and CBS News, a member of the Producers Guild of America, and a board member of the James Beard Broadcast and Media Awards Committee. Through Deborah Mitchell Media Associates, she will create your online personality with a customized website, book you on the right television show, manage your social media profiles, and connect you with the best and brightest digital influencers. Deborah is a weekly contributor for Entrepreneur.com and author of So You Want To Be On TV. You can follow Deborah @SocialTVDeb and/or email SocialTVDeb@gmail.com.